Holy Week Reflection- Part 7

Scripture reading: Luke 23:44-49

It was now about noon, and darkness came over the whole land^* until three in the afternoon, ⁴⁵while the sun’s light failed;^* and the curtain of the temple was torn in two. ⁴⁶Then Jesus, crying with a loud voice, said, ‘Father, into your hands I commend my spirit.’ Having said this, he breathed his last. ⁴⁷When the centurion saw what had taken place, he praised God and said, ‘Certainly this man was innocent.’^{* 48}And when all the crowds who had gathered there for this spectacle saw what had taken place, they returned home, beating their breasts. ⁴⁹But all his acquaintances, including the women who had followed him from Galilee, stood at a distance, watching these things.

Reflection: Love to the end

Darkness was taking over—so much so, that the sun’s light failed.   Jesus, the light of the world, was extinguished.   “Having loved his own who were in the world, Jesus loved them to the end.”  And with his final words of trust and love for God the Father, Jesus breathed his last.

In the mystery of the cross, when things were most desperate, and dark,  when all hope seemed lost, God’s love shone most intensely and fully.  God’s love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. God’s love never ends. 

What Wondrous Love Is This (vs. 1, 3,4)By: American Folk Hymn

What wondrous love is this, O my soul, O my soul!
What wondrous love is this, O my soul!
What wondrous love is this
That caused the Lord of bliss
To bear the dreadful curse for my soul, for my soul,
To bear the dreadful curse for my soul!
 
To God and to the Lamb I will sing, I will sing;
To God and to the Lamb I will sing;
To God and to the Lamb,
Who is the great I AM,
While millions join the theme, I will sing, I will sing,
While millions join the theme, I will sing.
 
And when from death I’m free, I’ll sing on, I’ll sing on;
And when from death I’m free, I’ll sing on.
And when from death I’m free
I’ll sing His love for me,
And through eternity I’ll sing on, I’ll sing on,
And through eternity I’ll sing on.

Holy Week Reflection- Part 6

Scripture reading: John 19:25b-27

²⁷While the soldiers were looking after themselves, Jesus' mother, his aunt, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene stood at the foot of the cross. Jesus saw his mother and the disciple he loved standing near her. He said to his mother, "Woman, here is your son." Then to the disciple, "Here is your mother." From that moment the disciple accepted her as his own mother. (The Message)

Reflection: Love for those who are beloved

 ‘And a spear will pierce your own soul too.’  Mary was watching the unthinkable happen to her son.  Here was her dear boy-  all grown up-- but her dear boy nonetheless,  and he was suffering and dying before her eyes. 

Yet, even in the midst of suffering and dying, he continued to reach out in love to those who were dear to him. 

Jesus didn’t want his mother to be alone, without care or provisions for her future.  In love and friendship, he entrusted his friend to his mother as well, that they both may benefit from the sweetness of the relationship that had nurtured him through his life.  Out of love, he gave up being Mary’s son, and entrusted her and the beloved disciple to each other. 

Music:

Were You There?

Were you there when they crucified my Lord? 

Were you there when they crucified my Lord? 

Oh, sometimes it causes me to tremble, tremble, tremble

Were you there when they crucified my Lord? 

Were you there when they pierced him in the side?

Were you there when they pierced him in the side?

Oh, sometimes it causes me to tremble, tremble, tremble

Were you there when they pierced him in the side?

Were you there when the sun refused to shine? 

Were you there when the sun refused to shine? 

Oh, sometimes it causes me to tremble, tremble, tremble

Were you there when the sun refused to shine?

Holy Week Reflections- Part 5

Scripture reading:  Luke 23:39-43

³⁹One of the criminals hanging alongside cursed him: "Some Messiah you are! Save yourself! Save us!"

   ^{40 -41}But the other one made him shut up: "Have you no fear of God? You're getting the same as him. We deserve this, but not him—he did nothing to deserve this."

   ⁴²Then he said, "Jesus, remember me when you enter your kingdom."

   ⁴³He said, "Don't worry, I will. Today you will join me in paradise."  (The Message)

Reflection:

 As we watch the crucifixion from a distance of 2,000 years, it is easy for us to rebuke the thief who is mocking Jesus.  Surely we would have known who he was if we were there with him.  But in our hearts of hearts, we know that it takes much less than being nailed to a cross for us to turn away from Jesus.  When life gets confusing, agonizing, or dangerous, we too can turn on Jesus and like the criminal on the cross we cry out- “why aren’t you saving us from this?”  In the end, we can see ourselves in the thief- for there is no distinction, St. Paul says-  since all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.

The other thief saw through the blood, the pain, and the utter absurdity of a crucified messiah, and asked Jesus to remember him when he came into his kingdom.  Did he truly see the King of Kings, or was he just hedging bets in case Jesus was the real thing?  We do not know, but Jesus promise of love to the thief was real. “Today you will be with me in paradise”. 

 Our response to Jesus doesn’t change Jesus’ love and faithfulness, any more than the thief’s ridicule made Jesus betray his mission of love.

God proves his love for us in that while we still were sinners Christ died for us.  In Jesus we see love in action, even in the face of ingratitude, fear and hatred.



Oh Sacred Head Now Wounded

Text: Anonymous; trans. by Paul Gerhardt and James W. Alexander
Music: Hans L. Hassler, 1564-1612; harm. by J.S. Bach, 1685-1750

1. O sacred Head, now wounded, 
 with grief and shame weighed down, 
 now scornfully surrounded 
 with thorns, thine only crown: 
 how pale thou art with anguish, 
 with sore abuse and scorn! 
 How does that visage languish 
 which once was bright as morn! 

2. What thou, my Lord, has suffered 
 was all for sinners' gain; 
 mine, mine was the transgression, 
 but thine the deadly pain. 
 Lo, here I fall, my Savior! 
 'Tis I deserve thy place; 
 look on me with thy favor, 
 vouchsafe to me thy grace. 

3. What language shall I borrow 
 to thank thee, dearest friend, 
 for this thy dying sorrow, 
 thy pity without end? 
 O make me thine forever; 
 and should I fainting be, 
 Lord, let me never, never 
 outlive my love for thee. 

---

Holy Week Reflections- Part 4

Scripture reading:Luke 23:32-38

 ³²Two others, both criminals, were taken along with him for execution.

   ³³When they got to the place called Skull Hill, they crucified him, along with the criminals, one on his right, the other on his left.

   ^{34 -35}Jesus prayed, "Father, forgive them; they don't know what they're doing."

   Dividing up his clothes, they threw dice for them. The people stood there staring at Jesus, and the ringleaders made faces, taunting, "He saved others. Let's see him save himself! The Messiah of God—ha! The Chosen—ha!"

   ^{36 -37}The soldiers also came up and poked fun at him, making a game of it. They toasted him with sour wine: "So you're King of the Jews! Save yourself!"

   ³⁸Printed over him was a sign: this is the king of the Jews.    The Message

Reflection: Love in Forgiveness

They crucified him. They nailed him to pieces of wood with big metal spikes.  They lifted the cross upright so that the pain and the angle of his body would kill him…would asphyxiate him…would leave him with no breath. 

What does love look like in the middle of this?  In the middle of intentional pain and torture, with people throwing dice for the clothes he had been wearing, and others making faces and taunting him-  wanting him to prove his power… Jesus forgave them. They didn’t ask him to forgive.  He just did it.  His forgiveness of them wasn’t up to them at all…  it was his alone to give.  Acting out of love in a way we can scarcely comprehend,  Jesus forgave them—and us. 

Chief of Sinners Though I Be (vs. 1-3)By: William McComb

Chief of sinners though I be,
Jesus shed his blood for me,
Died that I might live on high,
Lives that I might never die.
As the branch is to the vine,
I am his, and he is mine.
 
Oh, the height of Jesus’ love,
Higher than the heavens above,
Deeper than the depths of sea,
Lasting as eternity!
Love that found me wondrous thought
Found me when I sought him not.
 
Only Jesus can impart
Balm to heal the wounded heart,
Peace that flows from sin forgiven,
Joy that lifts the soul to heaven,
Faith and hope to walk with God
In the way that Enoch trod.

Holy Week Reflections- Part 3

Scripture reading: Mark 14:43-50

Immediately, while he was still speaking, Judas, one of the twelve, arrived; and with him there was a crowd with swords and clubs, from the chief priests, the scribes, and the elders. ⁴⁴Now the betrayer had given them a sign, saying, ‘The one I will kiss is the man; arrest him and lead him away under guard.’ ⁴⁵So when he came, he went up to him at once and said, ‘Rabbi!’ and kissed him. ⁴⁶Then they laid hands on him and arrested him. ⁴⁷But one of those who stood near drew his sword and struck the slave of the high priest, cutting off his ear. ⁴⁸Then Jesus said to them, ‘Have you come out with swords and clubs to arrest me as though I were a bandit? ⁴⁹Day after day I was with you in the temple teaching, and you did not arrest me. But let the scriptures be fulfilled.’ ⁵⁰All of them deserted him and fled. (NRSV)

Reflection:  Love for the friends that desert and betray

Just hours before, Jesus and the disciples had eaten a very special meal together. Jesus washed their feet and taught them how to love each other. He called them his friends.  He also knew that they would betray and desert him. These men who were closer to him than family, these ones  he trusted with his message and teachings, no matter how much they swore they would be at his side and defend him, he knew they would leave.  And they did. Every. Last. one. One of his own even sold him over to death.  Jesus loved them beyond the betrayal, beyond the desertion.  He loved them to the end of this life and beyond.

Jesus calls us friends, not because we have a better track record than the disciples—not because we’re more faithful than they were, for we too betray and desert Jesus for the things in our life that seem more important, or a better use of our time.  Jesus calls us friends and loves us to the end because that’s what love does.  Jesus loved the disciples not for who they were, but for who he was.  Jesus loves us not because of who we are or what we do…he loves us because of who he is.  He is the Son of God. He is love.  This is what Holy love does.

Hymn reflection: Ah, Holy Jesus

Ah, holy Jesus, how hast Thou offended,
That man to judge Thee hath in hate pretended?
By foes derided, by Thine own rejected,
O most afflicted.

Who was the guilty? Who brought this upon Thee?
Alas, my treason, Jesus, hath undone Thee.
’Twas I, Lord, Jesus, I it was denied Thee!
I crucified Thee.

Lo, the Good Shepherd for the sheep is offered;
The slave hath sinned, and the Son hath suffered;
For man’s atonement, while he nothing heedeth,
God intercedeth.

For me, kind Jesus, was Thy incarnation,
Thy mortal sorrow, and Thy life’s oblation;
Thy death of anguish and Thy bitter passion,
For my salvation.

Therefore, kind Jesus, since I cannot pay Thee,
I do adore Thee, and will ever pray Thee,
Think on Thy pity and Thy love unswerving,
Not my deserving.

Passion Sunday : Holy Week Reflections part 2

This  week in the Western Church is Holy Week.  Each day through Good Friday I will be posting reflections on the cross. Each is part of a Good Friday tenebrae service I helped write for Hope Lutheran Church in Toledo. I am sharing these here, as some folks who are reading this blog will not be able to attend Holy Week services.  It is my hope that God may work through these daily reflections to touch your heart and life.  Each day will have a scripture reading, a reflection and the words of a song.  May you have a blessed Holy Week~
Andrea
Scripture reading: Matthew 26:36-46

^{36 -38}Then Jesus went with them to a garden called Gethsemane and told his disciples, "Stay here while I go over there and pray." Taking along Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, he plunged into an agonizing sorrow. Then he said, "This sorrow is crushing my life out. Stay here and keep vigil with me."

   ³⁹Going a little ahead, he fell on his face, praying, "My Father, if there is any way, get me out of this. But please, not what I want. You, what do you want?"

   ^{40 -41}When he came back to his disciples, he found them sound asleep. He said to Peter, "Can't you stick it out with me a single hour? Stay alert; be in prayer so you don't wander into temptation without even knowing you're in danger. There is a part of you that is eager, ready for anything in God. But there's another part that's as lazy as an old dog sleeping by the fire."

   ⁴²He then left them a second time. Again he prayed, "My Father, if there is no other way than this, drinking this cup to the dregs, I'm ready. Do it your way."

   ^{43 -44}When he came back, he again found them sound asleep. They simply couldn't keep their eyes open. This time he let them sleep on, and went back a third time to pray, going over the same ground one last time.

   ^{45 -46}When he came back the next time, he said, "Are you going to sleep on and make a night of it? My time is up, the Son of Man is about to be handed over to the hands of sinners. Get up! Let's get going! My betrayer is here." (The Message)

Reflection:  Love in obedience

Faced with a decision that was crushing the life out of him, we see Jesus agonizing in the Garden of Gethsemane.  In a few short lines of scripture we hear Jesus move from fear to trust, but we know it wasn’t that easy.  Those few short lines speak of a time that must have felt like an eternity.  Jesus’ decision would make a difference for all eternity. 

St. Paul tells us in the Letter to the Philippians “(Jesus)  had equal status with God but didn't think so much of himself that he had to cling to the advantages of that status no matter what. Not at all. When the time came, he set aside the privileges of deity and took on the status of a slave, became human! Having become human, he stayed human. It was an incredibly humbling process. He didn't claim special privileges. Instead, he lived a selfless, obedient life and then died a selfless, obedient death—and the worst kind of death at that—a crucifixion.”   

Love and obedience mingled as Jesus trusted God with whatever came next.  He trusted his friends, his mission, his reputation and his very life to God.  Not my will, but yours, Father.  Jesus trusted the love that embraced him…and would soon embrace the entire world.

1. Go to dark Gethsemane,
Ye that feel the tempter's power;
Your Redeemer's conflict see,
Watch with Him one bitter hour:
Turn not from His griefs away
Learn from Jesus Christ to pray.

2. Follow to the judgment hall,
View the Lord of life arraigned;
O the wormwood and the gall!
O the pangs His soul sustained!
Shun not suffering, shame or loss
Learn from Him to bear the cross.

Lyrics: James Montgomery

Music: Richard Redhead

Holy and amazing God, turn our hearts to you this week. As we watch Jesus act in love and obedience, help us to trust you with our lives...our all. Amen.

Entering Holy Week- Intro and part 1

This coming week in the Western Church (not the Eastern Orthodox) is Holy Week.  Starting today and going through Good Friday I will be posting reflections on the cross. Each is part of a Good Friday tenebrae service I helped write for Hope Lutheran Church in Toledo. I am sharing these here, as some folks who are reading this blog will not be able to attend Holy Week services.  It is my hope that God may work through these daily reflections to touch your heart and life.  Each day will have a scripture reading, a reflection and the words of a song.  May you have a blessed Holy Week~
Andrea

Scripture reading:  John 1:1-5

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. ²He was in the beginning with God. ³All things came into being through him, and without him not one thing came into being. What has come into being ⁴in him was life,^* and the life was the light of all people. ⁵The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not overcome it.  (NRSV)

Reflection:  Love brought us here

In the beginning -  light, life…love.  God’s own word about reality,  the One whose life speaks to us about who God is… Jesus, The Word of God… hung on a cross. It was love that brought him here.  It is here that we see Holy love in its fullest-  love that is patient and kind, does not insist on its own way;  is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. On the cross we see love that bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 

Let us still our hearts and minds this week as we take time to look at the events of Good Friday through the eyes of love…God’s love.

When I Survey the Wondrous Cross       Issac Watts 1707

When I survey the wondrous cross On which the Prince of glory died, My richest gain I count but loss, And pour contempt on all my pride. Forbid it, Lord, that I should boast, Save in the death of Christ my God! All the vain things that charm me most, I sacrifice them to His blood. See from His head, His hands, His feet, Sorrow and love flow mingled down! Did e’er such love and sorrow meet, Or thorns compose so rich a crown? Were the whole realm of nature mine, That were a present far too small; Love so amazing, so divine, Demands my soul, my life, my all.

Praise You In This Storm

"I lift my eyes to the hills. From where will my help come?" Psalm 121:1

 We've recently had two of the sunniest and warmest days of the year and I find it ironic that I'm posting about storms and rain on these days :-) However, I am compelled strongly to share this video and song with you today~ I have a strong hunch that someone who reads this blog today is meant to hear this song~ May God speak to your hearts in this~
peace, Andrea

The Story Behind "Blessings" - Laura Story at WGTS Gateway

  Thank you to friend Beth for sharing the back story behind the song Blessings. The song was posted yesterday if you want to hear it. Laura Story's explanation behind the song is a powerful one, and I think speaks much to what those fighting chronic illness, and those fighting alongside those with chronic illness face.  May her words explanation also bless you~

Blessings

"We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28 Thank you to my daughter Rebecca, and my good friend Beth for sharing this song with me...worth sharing on the main page and not just in comments~ even if you've heard it before, I think it is so very good, that it's worth a second (or third) listen. may it bless you and may God speak to your heart today~

Not just a river in Egypt

“But the magicians of Pharaoh did the same by their secret arts; so Pharaoh’s heart remained hardened, and he did not listen to them, as the Lord had said. Pharaoh turned and went into his house, and he did not take even this to heart.”  Exodus 7:22-23  NRSV

When I first read this story of the Exodus and Pharaoh’s response, I wonder if he was stupid.  How could he not see what he was facing?  How could his denial be this great?

If I’m honest with myself (and Lent is an important time to be honest with oneself)  I realize that I can be just as stubborn and caught in denial as Pharaoh.  No, I’m not up against Moses and Aaron trying to free the people Israel, but I’m up against my own Exodus of sorts…finding freedom (even small amounts of it) from illness. 

I realized some of my own denial this morning when I was taking my series of vitamins.  It had been a while since I’d taken all of my vitamins. It doesn’t sound like a huge issue, but as many of you know, our systems can be pretty sensitive to changes and to deficiencies, so sticking to regular vitamins is important for me. Why hadn’t I taken them?  I didn’t use to have to take so many pills, and part of my denial is that I’m not “that sick”.  (I know, it is absurd, just like Pharaoh turning his back on the river of blood thinking that nothing important is going on.)

Denial is a part of grieving.  Folks with chronic illness can lose much: their livelihood, their familiar way of life, their understanding of who they are, and much more.  A coping mechanism, albeit a defective coping mechanism, is denial.  If we just deny that something has happened; if we just act like we always did; if we just don’t talk about it, it can’t be real.  Wow, do I resemble this sometimes!  Just get me near a delivery pizza when I’m hungry and don’t have gluten free options and I go into denial big time!!  “Gluten?  What gluten intolerance?  Nah! I can eat this pizza and it won’t have ANY effect on me!”  WRONG! 

Denial is a way of trying to live like nothing has changed. Does any of this sound familiar to you? 

I don’t like it, but I do live in the land of denial more than I want to regarding this illness.  The time I spend in denial, and in the aftermath of effects of that denial could be better used but facing the truth and coming up with a new game plan to live within the new limits.  It is not easy to do, but the first step is to be honest with ourselves. 

Is there something in your life that you need to stop denying?  Is there something that you need to face, and then find a game plan for coping with?

The first step is to be honest about our denial. The second step is to forgive ourselves and realize that denial is normal, but not productive.  Beating ourselves up will just waste energy and it is another twisted form of denial—it denies that we can actually do something to change the situation, and turns that energy sideways to blame it on self. 

A productive step is to make a game plan.  It doesn’t need to be perfect, but taking steps to start is a huge step away from denial.  It’s like Pharaoh turning around and saying, “Ok, I see there’s something going on. What do I need to do to face it?”

Today (and I’m telling you this publicly, so that I don’t keep denying that I need to do it J)  I am going to type up a check list of vitamins and meds. Then I can daily remind myself the timing and dosage of each pill, and keep myself accountable for taking it.  Will I do it perfectly?  Yeah…no.  My track record is that I will deny it again, but each step we take toward breaking the denial cycle helps us get stronger and better and moving forward.  And next time I need to break this particular vitamin denial, it will go a bit quicker, and will help me onto the track of caring for myself better.

How about you?  Have you been doing any swimming in denial lately?  If you have, please do what you need to do to take good care of yourself.  And please, always feel free to post or email me your thoughts and comments about your journey.

Peace,

Andrea

Dear Lord, it is amazing how we can deny things that are as plain as the nose on our face. Help us to see through the protective device of denial, and help us to be productive in becoming healthier, mentally, physically and spiritually. Lead us lord out of the land of denial.  Amen.

Dry Bones

"The hand of the Lord came upon me, and he brought me out by the spirit of the Lord and set me down in the middle of a valley; it was full of bones. ²He led me all round them; there were very many lying in the valley, and they were very dry. ³He said to me, ‘Mortal, can these bones live?’ I answered, ‘O Lord God, you know.’ ⁴Then he said to me, ‘Prophesy to these bones, and say to them: O dry bones, hear the word of the Lord. ⁵Thus says the Lord God to these bones: I will cause breath^* to enter you, and you shall live. ⁶I will lay sinews on you, and will cause flesh to come upon you, and cover you with skin, and put breath^* in you, and you shall live; and you shall know that I am the Lord.’
7 So I prophesied as I had been commanded; and as I prophesied, suddenly there was a noise, a rattling, and the bones came together, bone to its bone. ⁸I looked, and there were sinews on them, and flesh had come upon them, and skin had covered them; but there was no breath in them. ⁹Then he said to me, ‘Prophesy to the breath, prophesy, mortal, and say to the breath:^* Thus says the Lord God: Come from the four winds, O breath,^* and breathe upon these slain, that they may live.’ ¹⁰I prophesied as he commanded me, and the breath came into them, and they lived, and stood on their feet, a vast multitude.
11 Then he said to me, ‘Mortal, these bones are the whole house of Israel. They say, “Our bones are dried up, and our hope is lost; we are cut off completely.” ¹²Therefore prophesy, and say to them, Thus says the Lord God: I am going to open your graves, and bring you up from your graves, O my people; and I will bring you back to the land of Israel. ¹³And you shall know that I am the Lord, when I open your graves, and bring you up from your graves, O my people. ¹⁴I will put my spirit within you, and you shall live, and I will place you on your own soil; then you shall know that I, the Lord, have spoken and will act, says the Lord.’ "  Ezekiel 37:1-14


A bit of fun for this Monday morning.  This is a recording of the Delta Boys singing "Dem Bones".  Their sound is smooth as butter~ enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pYb8Wm6-QfA&feature=related

 Lord God, we know that you are the one who breathes life into us. There are days that we may feel dried up without energy and life. May your Spirit continue to breathe life into us, so we may live and serve you.  Amen.

The last word

“…he cried with a loud voice, ‘Lazarus come out!’ “  Matthew 11:43b

The whole Gospel reading for this Sunday is Matthew 11:1-45.  It is an extremely rich and powerful text, and I encourage you to read the entire reading if you are able.  As I looked at this text, dozens of sermon ideas came to mind, and I have preached many sermons on this text, both within the church year, and at funerals. Today let’s focus on this part near to the end.

Lazarus was very ill, and his sisters called for Jesus to come. They had, no doubt, seen Jesus heal the sick, and trusted that they could help them with their brother.  They had certain expectations for how this could go. Jesus, we read, delayed his travel intentionally because he had a different  understanding of what was to happen with Lazarus.  By the time Jesus gets there, Lazarus has been dead for several days. In that time and place, people were known to wake from comas, etc. even a couple of days after they were thought to have died.  Three days dead was considered really dead. Lazarus was beyond that. He was really, truly dead at four days, and besides, the stench of death was already there. Lazarus was beyond the healing Mary and Martha had seen from Jesus.  They were distraught, angry and yet still trusted Jesus when he asked what they believed. 

How many of us and our loved ones have had certain expectations of how our illness should go?  How many of us have prayed or perhaps heard people tell us that they are praying for us to be healed? What would that really look like in our lives now? 

The truth for many with chronic illness is that we don’t know what healing looks like or what form it might take.  We may hear Jesus call us by name to “come out!” and find that our bodies are healed, or we may find we are given new purpose, new hope and a new way to live our life with bodies that are still broken. Our expectation of what may happen to us are based upon the past…upon what we used to know.  Jesus’ expectations of us are based upon the future…what he knows and sees is possible for us, for us to live as children of God and for the glory of God.

Death took Lazarus. That is clear.  Jesus, however, saw that death wasn’t the final word. 

For some of us here, we will not see the physical healing of our bodies on this side of life. And for all of us, at some time death will take us. That is clear.  But it is not the final word. With Jesus, death is never the ultimate word.  It is the penultimate word—the next to the last word. The final word, the ultimate word belongs to Jesus who brought Lazarus back to life and who conquered death by his own death on the cross. 

After death, on that ‘great-getting-up-day-in-the-morning” , as my friend Brother Rudolph says, the final word for you and me will be “come out!”  Death will no longer hold us.  The final word is Life. 

Lord Jesus, Risen Lord, as you called Lazarus to come out of the grave, call us to come out of the things that bind us now so we may live our lives to your glory each day. And when we do face death, be with us, and remind us, that death is not the final word—not by a long shot—but that we will again hear you call us by name—finally to live with you eternally.  Amen.

Messages

" He said, ‘Go out and stand on the mountain before the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.’ Now there was a great wind, so strong that it was splitting mountains and breaking rocks in pieces before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake; and after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire a sound of sheer silence. When Elijah heard it, he wrapped his face in his mantle and went out and stood at the entrance of the cave. Then there came a voice to him that said, ‘What are you doing here, Elijah?’" 1 Kings 19:11-13

Yesterday I was surprised by a note…on our bathroom mirror. Being that the mirror hasn’t been cleaned in a while *ahem*, I’ve looked at this mirror a lot and never seen this note. Until I got out of the shower yesterday, that is.

The bathroom had steamed up, and suddenly, there it was as plain as day. No, it wasn’t like a note on a dirty car that says “wash me”…although it would have been fair.  This note said “I love U mom”. 

How moving, that one of my kids thought  ahead enough to write that on the mirror, and knew that I wouldn’t see it until the steam revealed it.  It got me to thinking… of course, on how God is also so determined to communicate with us, that God reaches us in extraordinary ways.

Elijah had been running for his life. He was in a cave and waiting to communicate with God. He listened through the earthquake and wind , but only afterward, when Elijah was really listening, did he hear God in the still small voice.

Before I became sick, I became aware, while working with congregations that were facing difficult transitions, that the times I was best at being a pastor were the times that circumstances literally forced me to my knees.  I was so sure of my skills many times, that I didn’t listen. But when situations would come up that confounded me, I would go to God in prayer.  Those times of kneeling at the altar in each congregation are some of the most precious faith times in my ministry. 

Only when things ‘steamed’ up, could I see the message clearly. Only in the ‘fog’, when I was listening and paying more attention, did I hear the God who had been communicating with me all along.

Illness has been a ‘fog’ for me in many ways.  And it certainly has brought me to the place where I sometimes have no clue what to do next. It’s there, on my knees (or more truthfully as a POTS patient…flat on my back) that I listen to God more attentively. I see the signs and hear the directions and encouragement much more clearly.  Only in the fog do I really find the answers clearly.

Whether you are in a fog today, or experiencing a sunny, bright health day, I encourage you to listen and look. One who loves you very much has sent you a message.

As for our bathroom mirror?  I’m waiting to see which one of our kids sees the message I sent back J

Dear Lord, still our hearts today so we can hear what you are saying.  Amen

A Lenten season

"Well and good if all things change, O Lord God, provided I am rooted in You." - St. John of the Cross

Every spring for about 6 weeks, the church engages in a time of intentional reflection on spiritual growth and purpose..it is called Lent.  It is a time in many congregation for more communal worship services, but also more solitary spiritual searching. As an introvert, I must admit that Lent and Advent have always been my two favorite seasons. Don't get me wrong, Christmas and Easter are by far my favorite festivals, but only in the years that I've taken Advent and Lenten contemplation seriously.

There is something so powerful about stripping away the busyness and making time to ponder. It can really shape who we are and how we approach life.  Just recently I've had several people refer to my illness as a "lenten" time.  The word "lent" means "spring".  At first, that image might sound odd, as we think of spring as a time of flowers and brighter sun and new life.  It is, indeed that, but at least for those of us in the northern mid-west, that doesn't really happen until May.  Early spring, March and April, are filled with days like today--dark, wet, gloomy at times, with hopes of a warmer and sunnier weekend.  Early spring is filled with uncertainty.  New shoots of flowers are sprouting, but the days and nights can still get very cold.  We live in a town where flooding occurs all too frequently, so planted crops are also in a tenuous situation. There are no guarantees in early spring.

Lent takes seriously God's presence even in those places where there are no easy optimistic answers. Lent takes seriously that Easter wasn't a forgone conclusion that first Holy Week.  St. John of the Cross' words bring the hope of a God who comes to be with us even in the darkness and uncertain times.  St. John's life is one that experienced several intense 'lenten' times, particularly after he was kidnapped and hidden away by those who hated his message. They kept him in a dark basement cell for 9 months, and beat him religiously 3 times a week.  And in that uncertain, dark, dank period of his life, St. John's faith bloomed and took deep root.

Many who seek out this blog are facing uncertain times. We do not know when or how this 'lenten' time in our lives may end.  We have gloomy, rainy days of pain, depression, nightmares, anxiety, loss and loneliness. We also have sunny, warm days even in the midst of all of this.  St. John's words remind us that these lenten times in our life are a powerful opportunity to set deep roots in the soil of God's grace.

When we can depend upon no one else, depend upon God.  When we can speak with no one else, we can speak with God.  When we do not know where to turn, turn to God.  The joy and peace of strengthening our relationship with God will sustain us. God will sustain us in these lenten times. No matter how long the season lasts.

Dear Lord, as we face Lent in the Church, many also face lenten times in their lives. A time where we can't really see or understand the growth happening to us.  Hold and sustain us precious Lord. Remind us of your closeness and your tender love in this lenten time.  Grow our faith, and strengthen our trust in you.  Amen.

In the arms of Christ

"for in Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith. For as many of you as were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves in Christ."  Galatians 3:26-27

Much of our focus here in the Chronic Hope Blog is on the health aspect of long-term illness. It is a necessary and important part of the conversation, as this is a place where we can discuss things that we may not hear in other places. Long-term illness has some unique qualities, and the "chronic" part of the title points to that.  Today I'd like to shift the focus more to the spiritual side and to the "hope" side. 

Whether we are physically or mentally facing long term struggles, or whether we are mostly whole and well, there is a common bond that we share as spiritually we all have the need for forgiveness and hope that comes from beyond ourselves.  I woke this morning a phrase from Sanctus Real's song "Forgiven" going through my head, and it seems like a great day to share this delightful song with you all.  And besides that, who can resist a little banjo music in the morning :-)  Enjoy~




Lord Jesus, there are many times where it may seem to us that we may not measure up to much in this life. In those times, no matter what we are facing, remind us that we are a treasure in your arms.  Thank you for clothing us with your grace and righteousness by the gift of baptism. Because of your mercy, we are forgiven, and we are yours.  We are grateful~  Amen.

Real Rest

"Come to me, all you who are weary and carrying heavy burdens and I will give you rest." Matthew 11:28 NRSV

At 6:45 this morning, driving back from an overnight sleep study, all I could think of was this passage and the promise of rest.  If you've ever had a sleep study taken before, you know that the word 'sleep' in the title is misleading.  The staff at the sleep center was amazing, kind and patient, and I have absolutely no complaints about how I was treated, and the room and accomodations couldn't have been better.  I am certain if I hadn't been hooked up to dozens of wires, electrodes and sensors, I would have had a wonderful sleep.  In any case, it was important for them to check out some things, and it seems thay got some important information out of it all. Needless to say, I am very tired this morning.

The idea of rest sounds beautiful to my ears today, but then Jesus invitation to come to him for rest sounds beautiful all the time.  This gentle beckoning to rest means more than 8 full hours on my sleep-number bed.  His invitation is to hand over our burdens to him.  Do we have concerns and worries that are weighing us down?  Do we have financial burdens that are heavy?  Are our physical ailments making us weary?  Jesus calls us to him to find rest. 

My favorite poet, David Whyte, indicates that the solution for burnout is not simply rest, but purposefulness. Being involved with something that has meaning, that has purpose is renewing and refreshing.  In our society, the trend is to just keep pushing through whatever is ailing us, to keep working even when we're too sick to be around others; to keep plodding on and keep on moving;  to forge ahead without evaluating whether what we are doing is good for us. 

Jesus, in contrast, welcomes us to come and sit by him for a while. "Come," he says. "Come and lay the worries about your family down.  Hand them over to me.  Come and give me the concerns about your health...I will treat them with care. Come and rest by my side, and I will keep watch.  Come and sit with me a while and we'll talk about what is meaningful for you, and what your purpose is here." 

Whatever rest you need today, whether a nap, or frreedom from fear and frustration, or direction...I invite us all to hear Jesus' calling to "Come".  We will find rest in him.

God of the Sabbath, you have made rest a part of creation and time, and yet we have not paid attention for ourselves or others. Help us today to find that delicious rest that Jesus alone can give. Help us to come to him, and receive what he has to give to us. Amen.

The Power of Gratitude

"I thank my God every time I remember you" Philippians 1:3  NRSV

In yesterday's blog I wrote about some of the things that restore my spirit, and I mentioned writing thank-you notes. It surprised me when those came to mind, because anyone who has known me for even a short amout of time has discovered that I'm really pretty inconsistent and often down-right terrible about writing thank yous.  It's not that I'm not grateful for what folks have done--honestly, I'm just a terrible procrastinator.  I put them off to the side and think, I need to write a nice note. And then time goes by and it seems too late to thank people.

Even with much time on my hands now that I'm unable to work, I haven't gotten better at thank-yous. So, why did they end up on my list of things that restore me?  Because, whether I'm good at expressing gratitude in cards or not, acknowledging someone else's generosity is something that encourages me, and helps me feel connected to others.  That connection to others is important...especially now.

One of the realities about long-term illness that we haven't talked much about yet here is that facing chronic illness can be very isolating and often lonely. Because of various limitations, it can be hard to interact with others as we have in the past, or as most other people interact.  For example, because I cannot stand or even sit for long periods on some days, I have had to excuse myself from events that I would have participated in.  And even then, when I go to some feeling poorly, I do not interact and joke and talk as I normally would have...I just am not able to.  After a while, having to exclude oneself from group events can make it harder to make connections with folks.  Also, I find that individual contact can be difficult as well, for there are some days I find it hard to concentrate or have the energy to even speak on the phone.  The effect of this can be cumulative.  I don't want to lose connection with others, but it is an understandable result. It takes more effort to stay connected intentionally with people.

Over the past months, I have had many folks send cards wishing me well. It has meant a great deal, but I've not had the ability to respond to all of them. (also flash-back to my poor track record with thank-yous here...)   As a way of taking positive action and intentionally connecting with people, I am setting up a writing center near the places I normally sit.  It is my intention, even on my worst days, to try and send a thank-you note to someone who has touched my life. 

I think doing this will help in several ways:  first, it will help to attend to those friendships and keep connections, so that people know I'm moved by their care, and they are reminded that they are indeed important to me.  The second thing this will do will be to focus my attention on gratitude. When I'm feeling most poorly, it is easy (and perhaps understandable) that I can focus on how lousy I feel. Writing a thank you helps me focus on those in my life who have blessed me.  It helps me to thank God every time I think of those who have made a diference in my life.  It is a positive action that I can take, that requires a workable amount of energy (who said I had to do it all at once, or write the card quickly?) and allows me to fight back against the effects of the illness.

Gratitude, especially now in my life, is an important force for healing and for connection.  Is there someone you can thank today?  Try it.  The power of gratitude just might make a difference for you today.

Dear God, thank you for the ability to be grateful. Help me today to look around me and see how you have touched my life through the actions of others.  Help me to acknowledge that gift gratefully, and find a way to let the other person know how grateful I am.  Amen.

Restoration

“ he restores my soul.” Psalm 23:3a

What restores you?  What is it that makes you feel alive, and refreshed and restored?  Think about it for one minute and write down whatever comes to mind.

(Did you really do it, or did you read on and say to yourself ‘oh, I’ll do it later’  like I usually do? J)  It will be helpful if you actually write things down.

Here’s the list I came up with of things that refresh and restore me:

A back massage, a good book, time by the lake, sitting under the stars on a warm night, a walk during a gentle snowfall, a warm cup of coffee with French Vanilla creamer on a cold morning, watching Lord Of the Rings, writing a thank you note, a phone call with a dear friend, playing with our big puppies, the sound of rain and wind, a warm scented bath or shower, cleaning a closet, sending a note or email of encouragement to someone else, and sushi.

Some of these things are seasonal, but as I just randomly answered this question myself, I am surprised by how simple most of these are. (I know, by now, you’re not surprised that I’m simple ~ LOL) 

I’m also surprised by how often I neglect doing these things that restore me. It seems that in long-term illness, I can get so stuck in a survival mode; in a manner of just getting through each day, that I neglect to enjoy the truly restoring things in my life.  God has given us many things around us that speak to our hearts and souls and can support us with gentle strength and restoration. Our lists will be as different as our personalities.  God is amazing in that the Lord can touch our hearts in so many different ways and through so many different mediums.

This week, I want to challenge us all to try and plan to do one restoring thing for ourselves, as we are able. If your energy is low, try for something that doesn’t take a lot of work, or if you have high energy, go for something that requires a bit more and can challenge you.  Listen to your heart and your body as to what will restore you, and then go for it.

Please also post some things that are on your list, so we can all learn and perhaps pick up some new ideas for being restored.

Amazing, restoring God, you surround us with your Love in so many ways. Help us to not be so caught in the mundane survival tasks, that we miss seeing the gifts you give to restore us.  Help us to utilize these gifts every day as you restore our soul.  Amen.

"You Look Good"

“for the Lord does not see as mortals see; they look on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7b

I’ve heard this account of the call of King David countless times. In fact, it is one of my favorite Bible stories. (My kids and confirmation students would interrupt me now and say ‘You say that about all the stories!”).  Nonetheless, it is a very familiar story, so I was surprised, while sitting in worship this morning when this part of the story took my brain off in another direction.

“for the Lord does not see as mortals see; they look on the outward appearance…”  What immediately came to mind was the phrase “You look good”.  One of the most baffling and surprising things about being ill for a long period of time has been that I have most often heard how good I look.  Now let me start by saying I appreciate the kindness of the words, and that folks are trying to be encouraging. What baffles me is that I hear this from people who have known me for quite a while, and would tell me (have told me J !)  when I haven’t looked so good.  The other baffling thing about this is that I hear that I look good most on days when I really don’t feel well.

Truth: with chronic illnesses looks can be deceiving.

I think back now to all the times I would visit someone in the hospital, or nursing home or a home-bound person, and I would say “There’s good color in your cheeks” or “you look good today”.  Yep. I have said it too…and I’ve meant it.  To be honest, I think it was part of my desire to be uplifting and encouraging to the person. To find some good in a situation that in all truth, really confounded me. I was trying to judge how they were doing off my understanding of ‘normal’.  They really DID ‘look’ good to me, but I didn’t always ask how they were really feeling.

It can be difficult, even embarrassing for me to have to explain sometimes that I’m really not feeling well, particularly on the days I’m trying to push through and do something and I look pretty good.  I am aware that lightheadedness and fatigue and pain are not necessarily things that ‘show’ easily. I’m also aware that I’m a person that puts on a good face to not worry others.  The days I really look like I feel, I’m at home, with unwashed hair, still in my pajamas at noon when my husband comes home for lunch, and I move slowly and painfully.  Most folks don’t see me on the days I look like I feel…

How about you?  Does any of this sound familiar?  Perhaps you’ve experienced similar things.  I’d love to hear your comments.

This morning, dressed for worship and moving very slowly, the words “the Lord looks on the heart” were comforting.  I know that in the context of the passage about King David it meant something different, and yet it speaks volumes to where I am today.  As I sit in worship while everyone else stands, because I can’t stand and sing without becoming very lightheaded;  as I sit or move slowly because I hurt, even though I ‘look’ like a healthy 44 year old woman, I find comfort that God knows what I am experiencing that day, even if everyone else around me has a difficult time seeing.  God knows that it’s not out of disrespect that I sit, but it has been a sacrifice to even get to worship.  God knows the days I’m frustrated, hurting, and exhausted, and loves me dearly even on those days. 

God knows and sees the challenges you face every day. God knows and sees the ways you are using your faith to keep moving forward. God knows and sees that, what may look like small steps to the rest of the world, may really be a huge effort for you and me.

God looks on the heart. God sees with eyes of love when God’s dear children are struggling, and understands what we face. 

Dear Lord, no matter how I ‘look’ today, please help me to remember that you see what I’m really facing, and you look upon my heart. Please comfort those who hurt and struggle today, and surround them with understanding and care. Amen.

Tempering Part II

"...we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next." Romans 5:4 The Message


Continuing with yesterday's tempered steel thoughts, here is a video from Garth Brooks that speaks beautifully to this process of allowing oneself to be changed and to live life out of that 'tempered' state.
It touches and encourages my heart every time I see it, and hope it is meaningful for you today~
Andrea

Tempering

^“3And not only that, but we^* also boast in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, ⁴and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, ⁵and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us. “ Romans 5:3-5 NRSV

These verses were part of the second reading for this past Sunday (Romans 5:1-11 if you want to read the whole thing). They lay between two sets of verses I’ve focused upon frequently in teaching and preaching, but I have to admit, I’ve usually skimmed over these particular verses to ‘get’ to the others.

Not so this time through. In reading this lesson, these verses jumped out.  I decided to try what I’ve done before in sermon prep, and check out another translation.  Here’s how Eugene Peterson translated it in the paraphrase Bible The Message:

^“There's more to come: We continue to shout our praise even when we're hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next. In alert expectancy such as this, we're never left feeling shortchanged. Quite the contrary—we can't round up enough containers to hold everything God generously pours into our lives through the Holy Spirit!” Romans 5:3-5  The Message

What jumps out for you in these passages? 

The phrase that really ‘popped’ for me today was “tempered steel”. Now, I’ve heard of it before, but really can’t explain it, so I did some research.   It was hard to find a definition that didn’t take me into the depths of metallurgy, but here is a basic definition- heating steel for a length of time at high temperatures so that it actually changes the structure of the steel.  Being tempered involves a lot of heat but it is important and valuable for the steel to go through that process.  If the blacksmith removes the steel before it is finished, it will be weaker than it was before.  In tempering the steel is made stronger, more pliable, more resilient, and more valuable.

Folks, I believe the encouragement in this passage is that God utilizes our struggles to shape us into people who are stronger, more resilient, and transformed to the core.   This passage encourages us to embrace the ‘tempering’ of our lives in whatever form those struggles take and to move into and through it, for God is at work. 

If these words would have come from anyone other than St. Paul, I would have been skeptical, however, St. Paul is one who knew suffering and tempering throughout his life and ministry. What he is saying comes first-hand from his experience.  It is an encouragement for us to await with expectancy what God will do through us next.

It is funny how God works…I Googled the term “tempered steel” this morning, and along with definitions I also came across a group that supports wounded veterans.  The word on their web page is “The stories behind the scars, uniting wounded warriors with the public through dialog.”  The visit to their web page was inspiration and moving and I’ve attached the link here: http://www.temperedsteelinc.org/  as well as at the bottom of this blog.  This link was a delightful find which actually fits magnificently with what the passage was talking about.

These people exemplify a patient expectancy of what God may do next through them.

Today I encourage us all to look to those who model what it is to go through the tempering of suffering.  I ask you to look at your own life—how have past struggles shaped you?  How might this present struggle be reforming you into someone who is stronger, more resilient, and of great value to those you touch?

Dear Lord, it is a challenge for us to see struggles as a tempering process. Help us to see how you have worked in our lives and in others to strengthen, and reshape during times of suffering. Shape us by your loving hand.  Amen.