"You Look Good"

“for the Lord does not see as mortals see; they look on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7b

I’ve heard this account of the call of King David countless times. In fact, it is one of my favorite Bible stories. (My kids and confirmation students would interrupt me now and say ‘You say that about all the stories!”).  Nonetheless, it is a very familiar story, so I was surprised, while sitting in worship this morning when this part of the story took my brain off in another direction.

“for the Lord does not see as mortals see; they look on the outward appearance…”  What immediately came to mind was the phrase “You look good”.  One of the most baffling and surprising things about being ill for a long period of time has been that I have most often heard how good I look.  Now let me start by saying I appreciate the kindness of the words, and that folks are trying to be encouraging. What baffles me is that I hear this from people who have known me for quite a while, and would tell me (have told me J !)  when I haven’t looked so good.  The other baffling thing about this is that I hear that I look good most on days when I really don’t feel well.

Truth: with chronic illnesses looks can be deceiving.

I think back now to all the times I would visit someone in the hospital, or nursing home or a home-bound person, and I would say “There’s good color in your cheeks” or “you look good today”.  Yep. I have said it too…and I’ve meant it.  To be honest, I think it was part of my desire to be uplifting and encouraging to the person. To find some good in a situation that in all truth, really confounded me. I was trying to judge how they were doing off my understanding of ‘normal’.  They really DID ‘look’ good to me, but I didn’t always ask how they were really feeling.

It can be difficult, even embarrassing for me to have to explain sometimes that I’m really not feeling well, particularly on the days I’m trying to push through and do something and I look pretty good.  I am aware that lightheadedness and fatigue and pain are not necessarily things that ‘show’ easily. I’m also aware that I’m a person that puts on a good face to not worry others.  The days I really look like I feel, I’m at home, with unwashed hair, still in my pajamas at noon when my husband comes home for lunch, and I move slowly and painfully.  Most folks don’t see me on the days I look like I feel…

How about you?  Does any of this sound familiar?  Perhaps you’ve experienced similar things.  I’d love to hear your comments.

This morning, dressed for worship and moving very slowly, the words “the Lord looks on the heart” were comforting.  I know that in the context of the passage about King David it meant something different, and yet it speaks volumes to where I am today.  As I sit in worship while everyone else stands, because I can’t stand and sing without becoming very lightheaded;  as I sit or move slowly because I hurt, even though I ‘look’ like a healthy 44 year old woman, I find comfort that God knows what I am experiencing that day, even if everyone else around me has a difficult time seeing.  God knows that it’s not out of disrespect that I sit, but it has been a sacrifice to even get to worship.  God knows the days I’m frustrated, hurting, and exhausted, and loves me dearly even on those days. 

God knows and sees the challenges you face every day. God knows and sees the ways you are using your faith to keep moving forward. God knows and sees that, what may look like small steps to the rest of the world, may really be a huge effort for you and me.

God looks on the heart. God sees with eyes of love when God’s dear children are struggling, and understands what we face. 

Dear Lord, no matter how I ‘look’ today, please help me to remember that you see what I’m really facing, and you look upon my heart. Please comfort those who hurt and struggle today, and surround them with understanding and care. Amen.