Growth

“He also said, ‘The kingdom of God is as if someone would scatter seed on the ground, and would sleep and rise night and day, and the seed would sprout and grow, he does not know how. The earth produces of itself, first the stalk, then the head, then the full grain in the head. But when the grain is ripe, at once he goes in with his sickle, because the harvest has come.’  Mark 4:26-29  NRSV

In the tradition I’m most familiar with, today is Shrove Tuesday.  It is the last day before Ash Wednesday and the season of Lent.  It is a day when folks (centuries ago) would use up the last of the sugar and fat, and other more celebrative ingredients in their kitchen and would prepare for a time of fasting and more reflective and penitent behavior.  It is often a day now when people consider what they will ‘give up’ for lent so they can focus on spiritual growth.

Three years ago when I was first hit by the POTS, I jokingly replied that I’d given up standing for Lent, as the only thing that made the lightheadedness abate was laying down.  In the Lenten seasons since, I’ve given careful thought to my Lenten discipline.  For me and perhaps for many of us with chronic conditions, it is not necessarily as easy as ‘giving up’ something.  In order to function, over the past three years I’ve given up wheat and gluten, caffeine, alcohol, and some other things on a daily basis. Now, I have to admit that I’m about as good at giving these things up, as I have been at my former Lenten disciplines.  I slip up and make choices for coffee, or regular pizza or even a beer once in a while…yes, and I pay the price physically the next days.  Many of us have given up many things daily just to be able to keep functioning.

Last year I took a different approach.  Because my life seemed to be one restriction and one thing after another ‘given up’, I chose to add something beneficial to my list of daily things.  Because of rather high stress levels last year, I chose to relax and read a fiction book at least ½ an hour every day during Lent.  It was a nurturing and helpful reminder that the weight of the world is not on my shoulders. It helped remind me that God is God and I am not.  This year I am choosing to go get a Jade plant, and work on nurturing it during the Lenten season (and beyond.)

I’m choosing this  action  because I need to remember Jesus’ parable above: that growth happens…in plants…in our lives…in the Kingdom of God, not merely by our efforts, but by God’s grace and care.  It will also be very helpful to me over the next 40 or so days, to have another living thing to focus care on.  I find that when I’m physically feeling so lousy, it is easy for me to turn all my focus on myself.  It is much more healing and encouraging for me to be able to look outside of myself, and focus on what God is doing in another living thing.  (And a plant will be less freaked out than my kids if I sit there and stare at it and ponder J )

I also am choosing a Jade plant because it grows slowly.  It will help me practice the discipline of patience in the midst of slow changes, and remind me that God is faithful even when my eyes can’t see what is happening.

This Lent, I invite you, instead of giving up something to try and add one useful thing to your daily discipline.  It can be as simple and inexpensive as possible.  Plant the seed in your life, and trust that God will bring the growth.

Dear God, you are at work all around us and even within us. You are growing things and making changes that our eyes may not be able to perceive.  Help us to open our hearts this day to your nurturing love, and make us more aware of your movement all around us.  Amen